21 OCTOBER 1944
U S S PRAIRIE
DEAREST LITTLE SISTER,
NINE YEARS AGO I NEVER THOUGHT I'D BE WRITING A BIRTHDAY LETTER SOMEWHERE IN THE PACIFIC, ESPECIALLY TO A LITTLE SISTER. AT THAT TIME I WAS ALL FOR A LITTLE BROTHER, IN FACT MOM HAD PROMISED ME THAT I'D HAVE A LITTLE BROTHER AND HIS NAME WOULD BE CHARLES WILLIAM. I JUST KNEW THAT IT WAS IMPOSSIBLE FOR ONE KID LIKE ME TO BE OUTNUMBERED BY SO MANY GIRLS IN THE FAMILY AND SO PUT ALL MY FONDEST HOPES ON GETTING A BABY BROTHER- ONE THAT I COULD BEAT UP LIKE MY FRIENDS DID TO THEIR LITTLE BROTHERS. SO I WAS ALL HAPPY UNTILL I FOUND OUT THAT MOTHER HAD CROSSED ME AND GIVEN ME THREE TO ONE ODDS IN FAVOR OF GIRLS. THEN AND THERE I MADE A RESOLUTION THAT GIRLS WOULD ALWAYS BE MY FAVORITE ENEMYES. IT REALLY EMBARRASSED ME TO HAVE TO ADMIT TO FRIENDS THAT I DIDN'T HAVE A BROTHER. THREE SISTERS, IT WAS ALWAYS THE SAME, MY CHUMS WOULD JUST ROLL THEIR EYES AND SHAKE THEIR HEADS IN SYMPATHY. 'POOR YENNE' THEY'D SAY, AND THEN POLITELY OFFER ME A BITE OF CANDY IN ORDER TO CONDOLE ME.
BUT AS WOMEN ALWAYS MANAGE TO DO, LITTLE OR BIG, EATING INTO THE UNSUSPECTING MALE HEART, IN A FEW MONTHS I HAD BEEN WON OVER TO THE FEMALE CAUSE. ANYWAY, BY THE TIME TWO YEARS HAD PASSED, I HAD NOTICED THAT NO BROTHER COULD CAUSE AS MUCH PANIC, NOISE OR JUST PLAIN PANDEMONIUM ON THE SAME NOTICE. BY THE END OF THE SECOND YEAR YOU AND I WERE PLAYING FOOTBALL UP IN THE HALLWAY. FOR ABOUT FIVE YEARS YOU AND I HAD SOME PRETTY HOT GAMES, DIDN'T WE? NOT ONLY COULD YOU MANAGE TO RUN YOUR DAD, MOM, TWO OLDER SISTERS, BUT EVEN ME TO THE CLEANERS. THERE WERE TIMES, MY PET, LIKE WHEN YOU BROKE INTO MY MOVIE FILM AND CAUSED UNHOLY DAMAGE TO MY FAVORITE MUTT AND
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JEFF CARTOON, THAT WRINGING YOUR NECK WOULD HAVE BEEN TOO SOFT A PUNISHMENT. BUT EVEN AT THAT YOU SOON SHOWED THE MALE PORTION (WHAT THERE WAS OF IT) OF THE FAMILY JUST WHAT THEIR PROPER PLACE WAS BY BECOMING CHAMPEEN FISHERMAN OF THE ENTIRE YENNE CLAN. YES MAM- YOU COPPED ALL HONORS IN THAT LINE. BIG GAME DIDN'T BOTHER YOU EITHER- REMEMBER THE PORCUPINE (PORKYPINE)? EVEN THE COLD WATERS OF TEMAGAMI DIDN'T CURB YOUR BRAVERY AS AN HONEST TO GOODNESS CAMPER. YES SIR, DORA, I DOUBT IF ANY LITTLE BROTHER COULD LIVE UP TO THE SENSATIONAL RECORD YOU'VE MADE. POOR MAMA, I REMEMBER HER SAYING THAT IT WAS NICE YOU WERE A LITTLE GIRL BECAUSE YOU COULD KEEP HER COMPANY AFTER THE REST OF US KIDS LEFT HOME-SWEET GENTLE LITTLE GIRL. ACCORDING TO DAD YOU'RE NUMBER ONE HITTER ON THE BLOCK, ALL-STAR TACKLE.
WELL, HONEY, YOU'RE TOPS WITH ME, AND MAYBE IN ANOTHER YEAR WE CAN CELEBRATE YOUR BIRTHDAY TOGETHER. WE CAN HAVE SOME OF THOSE BULL SESSIONS AFTER YOU'VE GONE TO BED AND RE-DO SOME OF THE SWELL LITTLE THINGS WE'VE DONE. I BECOME A LITTLE AFRAID, THOUGH, THAT YOU ARE NOW BECOMING A BIG GIRL- MORE INTERESTED IN SCHOOL THAN IN OUR FOOTBALL GAMES UPSTAIRS, MORE INTERESTED IN FANCY DRESSES TO WOO THE BUDDING MASCULINE HEARTS OF GRADE SCHOOL THAN IN THOSE RUGGED BULL SESSIONS.
BUT, NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU CHANGE YOU'LL ALWAYS HOLD THE CONTROLLING INTEREST IN EVERY HEART THAT KNOWS YOUR HEART. PLEASE BE GOOD AND REMEMBER THAT ALTHOUGH SOMETIMES MOM AND DAD MAY SEEM A BIT MEAN OR CRANKY THEY ARE KIND GOOD AND LOVABLE AND MOST MISSED WHEN ONE IS AWAY FROM THEM AWHILE.
~~XXXXX~~ LOTS OF LOVE,
Buddy [signature]
Cartoon Page - Halloween/Birthday Theme
Header: "Oct 31 1925" (wrong year - should be 1935)
Main Image: A witch labeled "MRS. B.E. WITCH" riding a motorcycle with a broom strapped to the back, holding a "PILOTS LICENSE," saying "AWK!" A jack-o'-lantern floats nearby. The witch is riding toward "FULLER" (possibly a location).
Text block:
"OF COURSE, DORA
IN 1925 MRS. B.E. WITCH
RODE A 'MODERN' MOTORCYCLE-
TODAY - WITH SUCH FANTASTICALLY
NEW FANGLED CONTRAPTIONS, LATEST
REPORTS HAVE IT THAT SHE HAS
ABONDED THE MOTORCYCLE - AND
ENTIRELY DONE AWAY WITH THE BROOM.
NOW SHE RIDES ABOUT ON A
JET-PROPELLED ROBOT BOMB. THE
STORK HIMSELF HAS RESORTED TO
A SPEEDY P-51."
Lower illustrations:
- "HAPPY BIRTHDAY FROM BUDDY" with musical notes
- House labeled "1134 WEBB" with "DELIVERY DALE" and street sign "1134 WEBB ROAD"
- A delivery stork with "WHOOOOOOO" sound effect
- "MOTORCYCLE FOR RENT" sign with a rabbit saying "What say Doc!"
- "HSY SR." (Dad) on the ground with "JR" and note "NUTS TO WOMEN!"
- A witch on a jet-propelled bomb dated "1944" saying "CURSES!"
- Jack-o'-lantern saying "OH, FOR THE GOOD OLD DAYS"